Quasi-drunken phone conversations on New Year's Eve

"You can't make out with a St. Bernard. Well...you can, but it's just wrong."



HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I was tagged.

Or called out, however you want to look at it. Do people really learn stuff from these? *sigh*

Here goes:

ABCs of Me(me)

A- Available or taken? Available for what?

B- Best Friend? Izzy, I suppose. Sometimes my daughter. Myself. I often feel alone.

C- Cake or Pie? Pie. Pumpkin. That I made.

D- Drink of Choice? Coffee or water.

E- Essential Item? My lappy.

F- Favorite Color? Purple and green.

G- Gummi Bears or Worms? Bears.

H- Hometown? Currently? Denver, Colorado Recently? Denver, Colorado Originally? Amana, Iowa.

I- Indulgence? Time by myself at Lake Steam Baths. It's not expensive--the time away is my indulgence.

J- January or February? February--my birthday, my daughter's birthday (same day), my dad's birthday, Eric's birthday, Debbie's birthday.

K- Kids and names? Kira!

L- Life is incomplete without? My girl. My husband.

M- Marriage Date? October, 1996

N- Number of Siblings? 2--one sister and one brother

O- Oranges or apples? Clementine oranges

P- Phobias/Fears? Insects. Financial insolvency.

Q- Favorite Quote? "Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it." -- Goethe

R- Reason to Smile? My daughter's.

S- Season? Fall.

T- Tag three people! Must I? Fine--SueEllen, Esri, and some random blogger to be reavealed later, upon participation.

U- Unknown Fact About Me? I'm actually quite intelligent.

V- Vegetable you hate? Raw tomatoes.

W- Worst habit? Too much talk, not enough action.

X- X-Rays you've had? Teeth, lungs, ankle bones.

Y- Your favorite food? Roast chicken.

Z- Zodiac? Aquarius/Capricorn/Leo

End-of-Year Post

I am tired.

"The Year That Was" makes me want to barf. I am tired of the Top Ten Most Awesomest Stuff That Happened in 2006 articles in the paper/magazines/blogs. Sick of it!

I'm also sick of the snow. Perhaps I'm a bit touchy from the cabin fever. Strap yourselves in, folks.

Instead of recapping this past year, let's make my annual wish list, shall we? We shall. In the spirit of manifesting the life we want, we shall now proclaim the End-of-Year Post to be:

How My Life Is Now: A List of Affirmations

Those who practice affirmations should know that, to do them correctly, one must say them as if they are already true. Example:

I am a publishing magnate.

Okay. Here we go:

• I live in a lovely home, situated on one acre, in a lovely part of the world.
• I drive a stylish, safe, and useful vehicle.
• I wear lovely clothes.
• I am wealthy.
• I carry this handbag.
• I wear this jewelry.
• I wear this watch.

This is too much fun. I'll add to the list more, later.

The funniest of the Internets.

Viewer discretion advised. And also prepare yourself to laugh. Go pee first, then read it. Hilarious!

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to all who celebrate it. I hope Santa brought you what you wanted.

I got:

• two extra days of vacation (no word yet on whether or not we'll have to "make them up"--probably will, but for now, I'll take two extra days when the kids were insanse)
• over 2 feet of snow
  
• my daughter, opening presents and saying "present" and "help me, mama" and "it's a toy!"
• nice dinners with my immediate family
• nice Christmas Eve with husband's family, including cousin J, who ran around like a maniac with my daughter, which is hilarious to watch
• time to myself to take a bath and read Entrepreneur magazine
• coffee every morning
• time playing in the snow with my kiddo--she's never had the opportunity to do so, so that was a hoot--we built a snowman, making the eyes, nose, and arms out of carrots for the neighborhood squirrels. Oh, and the snow "man" had boobs.
  
• time in the evenings watching "family" movies: Ice Age, Madagascar, March of the Penguins

Too, too many benefits to list. Got a couple of lovely gifts from my hubby, as well. But please note how many times the word "time" is listed above.

Bless you all.

SNOW DAY!

SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!


You think kids get excited about a day off? They've got nothing on the excitement that teachers feel.

Whiny and petulant

Do you know what it's like to hate your job, and not be able to quit? I suppose Drew Carey would tell me that I belong to an exclusive support network called "Everybody" and they meet at "The Bar."

But man, I tell you, it's tough. It's tough when, ever since I had a kid, I've wanted to stay home more than anything. I knew, somehow, that I was supposed to be home with her, supposed to be there for her every single minute.

But I can't. I have to go away to work every day.

And now? Now she has autism. And nobody knows why, of course. They say it isn't our fault. They say it's not environmental, not because of a lack of vitamins, not because of trauma. They say it's genetic. But if it's something she was born with, then who the hell else do you blame? She came out of my body. I birthed her. Therefore, I am to blame.

But it isn't that simple, is it? Disabilities aren't that simple. Placing blame isn't often helpful. Even "pinpointing a cause" isn't helpful, because it's in the past, and she is here, now, and I have to help her. But I have to go away to work every day. It's torn me up ever since the day I had to return to work, and it still tears me up. Tears me up worse, now, since her disability sounds so stinking severe.

It's put me in a bit of a tailspin.

It's also affected my holiday spirit, to be very frank. I'm not as excited about the holidays as I normally would be. I'm not depressed, just stressed out. The whole thing makes my stomach hurt if I think too much about it.

Her face is here, right in front of me, taped to my computer. At home, her face is my desktop picture.

I suppose she was born to me for a reason. But I've got to be done with the blaming pretty soon. It's tiresome.

And I've got to be self-employed, soon. Every day feels very, very desperate.

A funny.

Just for you.

Feeling snarky? Then watch this...

...because even though it's a bit glurgy, it's true.